Paul Bunyan - Lumber Camp Tales (1962)

Paul bun probably the greatest Woodsman of all time Lumber Jack told hundreds of stories about Paul some almost as tall as Paul himself how tall was he well you know how tall trees grow in the Northwoods don't you well in his stalking feet Paul bunan was taller than the tallest tree Big H you've all seen a railroad locomotive why one of Paul's boots was about that size and you've all seen Telegraph poles well Paul he had Telegraph poles made up special to use for [Music] toothpicks a Paul's best friend was an ox not this Ox Paul's Ox babe was blue and bigger than the ordinary size ox in fact he was so big that every time shoes were made for him they had to open up a new iron mine actually babe was the best worker in the camp why one day in town Paul loaded babe with all the camp supplies The Lumberjacks would need for the whole winter with such a load babe was so heavy that with every step his hoop sank deep into the solid rock later a tremendous storm came along and it rained something terrible for days so that water filled the holes that babe had made and that's how come you find so many lakes in the Northwoods country today now it was close to the banks of a river the big onion River to be exact that Paul bunan had built his Lumber camp that was some Camp the bunk house was of a pretty good size the inside there were about 295 tiers in each tier the bunks were stacked 137 High the camp bugler had to use one of those flying balloon Contraptions that was so he could wake up those Lumberjacks in the highest bunks again getting down was another story of course each of those upper bunks had a parachute made out of a bed sheet and that was how those Fells got down to Solid Ground yes sir that bunk house was of a fair size so is the cook [Music] Shack now in charge of that cook Shack were hot biscuit Slim the chief cook and cream puff fatty the chief assistant cook no two men could cook enough food to feed the big crew at Paul Bun's Camp so slim and fatty had a few helpers a 100 to be exact for breakfast the hundred helpers greased the cook Shack griddle for Flapjacks oh there would be some who'd say that was a pretty big job seeing how The Griddle was the size of a base ballpark but slim and fatty had the whole thing worked out each of the helpers tied slabs of bacon to their feet and then they'd skate out over the griddle and grease it quick as a wink once The Griddle had been greased slim and fatty climbed up to the gate of the storage tank where they kept the sourdough batter for pancakes well they'd open up the gates and huge gobs of sourdough batter had run right down on of The Griddle yes sir it was the opinion of about everyone in Camp that Flapjacks made by this system were the best in the whole world and just one of those tremendous Flapjacks was breakfast enough for five ordinary men but Paul bunan could pack away more than a dozen L now one day as he's finishing his breakfast Paul sees Little Johnny inkslinger the camp timekeeper now Johnny's hopping mad hey Johnny Paul says what's your complaint come on up and tell me about it what's my complaint Johnny shouts I just been down to the Saw Mill and that Mill was just as quiet as could be that saw wasn't moving a bit and neither were those Mill hands our men had cut down the trees and were taking the logs to the river but because of that dared old winding big onion River the logs never reach the Sawmill they get jammed up solid that's my complaint shouts Johnny well now Paul decided to take a look for himself sure enough those logs were packed tight his sardines if he didn't unjam those logs the lumber Camp would go broke the only thing to do was to straighten out that winding River Paul started to think it [Music] out well meanwhile back at the camp Johnny told slim and fatty about the heavy thinking Paul was doing and they got their hundred helpers busy making a little popcorn for Paul everybody knew that popcorn was Paul's favorite thinking food well sir before you know it they're shipping out PopCorn by the wagon load and sending it to Paul oh Paul he'd scoop up a wagon load of popcorn and chew it down and do some more heavy thinking then he'd scoop up another wagon load and another and another till all the ground for miles around is covered white with popcorn scraps well from their Lookout in the trees the birds were scared clear out of their wits they thought that suddenly winter had come and immediately set off for warmer Parts seeing their mistake Paul got an idea right away Paul walked straight from the North Woods up to the North Pole [Music] and there he built two traps and baited them with icicles then Paul hid himself and waited soon enough Along Came two fat little blizzards huffing and puffing looky there one blizzard whistles icicles and the second blizzard said yeah those blizzards dived into the traps and slam they were caught well Paul gathered up those trap blizzards and in a wink he was back at the banks of the big onion River what did he do with those blizzards he tied one blizzard on one side of the river and the other on the opposite Shore and those blizzards were so angry at being caught they puffed and blew and whistled and sh creaked such chilling winds that before anyone knew it the Waters of the big onion River were frozen [Music] solid well then Paul got a loging chain he hooked one in babe and the other end around the Frozen River next Paul tied a second chain to the mouth of the river and around his shoulders and then he yelled pull babe pull well what with babe pulling on one end of the river and Paul pulling on the other end of the river that winding old big onion snap straight as a board now since a winding river is naturally longer than a straight one a piece of the big onion was left over well Paul cut up that leftover piece of river into sections 10 Mi long and had them rolled up for ship to Desert lands where water was needed pretty bad then Paul untied the blizzards and let him Barrel back to the North Pole after they had left the ice of the big onion River melted back to water and then the logs floated free and easy down toward the Sawmill so that was how Paul bunan fixed the winding River and put his Lumber Camp back in working order of course that's but one of the stories told about Babe the Blue Ox and his owner the sure enough greatest Lumberjack of all time Paul bun