David Letterman on Tonight Show Johnny Carson 1980s KCST San Diego

about a half an hour beforehand. >> Yeah. >> I think they got the feeling if they didn't laugh, they were going to have to leave the studio and bring in the other >> audience. It worked very nicely. See, you you are a well-rounded entertainer, performer. >> Oh, come on, D. >> And and in my case, whenever I'm uh in New York City or here in California, the Golden State, people come up to me. >> I don't Is that funny? I don't even know. >> People come up to me and they invariably will say the same thing. They'll say, "Excuse me, Mr. Cppel." And I'll say, "Yes, what?" And [laughter] they say, "You don't really do anything. We've seen your little nickel dime show there on NBC. We've seen that thing at midnight or whenever the thing is on. And you don't really do anything. You don't sing, you don't dance, you don't act, per se. Is there anything you do?" And and I've been searching my my soul and of course my performer's trunk, of course. [laughter] Um, and it it occurred to me uh that I do something and and I've done it before on on my little show and with your permission I'll do it here tonight. Sure. >> And it's it's an impression. >> Well, >> it's a very >> I don't think I've ever seen you do it. >> I know. I know. [applause] >> And it's it's a little obscure, but I think the execution will offset the obscure nature of the impression. It's it's Do you mind if I stand? Sure. Go right ahead. This is uh this is my impression of Detroit Tiger manager Sparky Anderson. So see some people already know. >> Um [applause] this this is Sparky listening listening now to a question. Listening to a question, Ed. >> I got it. [laughter] >> Got it. >> Which has been a career for you, hasn't it? Yeah. >> Listening listening to a question in a postgame interview. >> Uhhuh. >> Sparky Anderson listening to a question postgame interview. And it goes something >> something. [laughter] [cheering] [applause] >> I think it was the the attitude that carried. [laughter] >> You don't You don't think I oversold? >> I thought I thought it was going to be lousy. [laughter] Well, And I first of all, let me thank you when we come back for coming out here. You know, you're off for a week. You must have lost in the stock market and out here to grab the 470 on this show. I suppose just cuz you we know that David's out in Malibu now. Tell them the truth. >> I never see you. >> You think I should handle this, Ed? >> Honestly, >> I never see you. Well, for one thing, I see that dumb truck. Your dumb truck is gone. >> The truck is gone. That That red truck is gone. >> The truck is What happened to the truck? >> Well, we we we're stabling it. We put it away. We put it away because the value of it as a as a tourist attraction >> is and you know a little something about tourist attractions with >> Carson Land down there where you live. >> This is it's like 40 acres in this guy's front yard and it's water slides and goart tracks and >> we took the slide out. It was >> teenage kids dressed up in big Ed McMahon costumes walking around. [laughter] Don't you find that that people think because you know somebody and you do the same kind of work that you you're hanging out all the time and I never see you. >> Yeah. Yeah. That's right. I I remember a long time ago Jimmy Walker uh was telling me uh he had been on Good Times >> mean the former mayor of New York. >> That's right, John. The former Yes. Oddly enough, I'm going to tell a story now. No, no, not that Jimmy Walker. [laughter] >> The uh he used to be on Good Times and he was flying on a plane somewhere and a woman comes up to him and she taps him on the shoulder. same premise and she says, "Excuse me, can you tell me how to get in touch with the Mills brothers? [laughter] This doesn't make any sense. That's the way some kind of content." >> Yeah, but that you're right, John. >> I never see Don't you do you jog? I never see you around the neighborhood. Weren't you a little worried when we had the earthquake? You're in New York. You got a house there. Earthquake. >> Yeah, I was a little worried. What are you getting at? >> Oh, I'm [ __ ] Did you have any trouble in your house? >> No, I uh No, the house came through unscathed. This was a big one. This was nearly like a 7 point something. Uh, and in the times that I've lived in in California since uh, 75, I've only been through one, which is about a three-pointer. And a three-pointer is a is a pretty good uh, rattling. And, uh, kind of an interesting story to this, John, if you have a minute. >> Sure. Um, >> of course, it has nothing to do with former New York Mayor Jimmy Walker, but >> uh, it was uh, New Year's Day, either 78 or 79. I don't know which one. 78, 79. It's It's all fuzzy now. And um my girlfriend and I, we wanted we wanted to start the new year right. >> This the same girl you're going with now? >> Yeah. In a in a positive, upbeat fashion. We wanted to get the year off to a really So we went to one of these uh x-rated motel and we checked in really really horrible horrible places. And uh you go in and there's mirrors on the ceiling and the rubber sheets and and shag shag carpeting on the floor of an X-rated motel. Is there no greater incubator or transmitter of mutant diseases than shag carpeting? So So we made a pack. We'd leave our shoes on now. >> Yeah. Mayor of New York. Walking. Give me walking. >> [laughter] >> And uh so we're in there about an hour. Oh, and you get champagne. You check in. This is insane. They give you like a two cent cigar and a bottle of champagne. And it's that the delicious 7-Eleven Big Gulp champagne. [laughter] >> So, uh we're in there and things are all right. We're having a pretty good time. And all of a sudden, holy hell breaks loose. The bed starts to shake. The room starts to shake. The entire structure is shaking. And I honest to God, the first thought that came to my mind was this. I said to myself, "Wow, somebody really knows what they're doing. >> It's an awful story." >> No, it's not an awful story. Jimmy Walker would love that. >> I'm I'm ashamed now that I It's a story. [laughter] >> See, I wasn't trying to You must understand. I wasn't trying to when you said Jimmy Walker, I'll show you the difference in our ages. I didn't think of Jimmy Walker, the comedian. I thought of Jimmy Walker, the former mayor of New York. >> And I'm didn't mean to jump in there. >> You know, the Dodgers moved out of Brooklyn. >> And and Lindberg made it too. I understand. Yeah. >> Yeah. [laughter] >> You don't uh you used to work nightclubs, but sparingly, didn't you? You never really spent much time. >> I hated it. I was uh a couple of reasons that because I I was not very good at it and I I I really hated it. But uh my first actual nightclub job was uh in a place in Denver and uh was I'd been doing it about a year. It was 1976, the year of the bsentennial. I was opening. Now this is a dream ticket. I'm opening for Leslie Ugams. >> So um knows the Mills brothers. [laughter] >> So uh we we we get into Denver. Nice club. very nice club about 300 400 people downstairs and upstairs they have a combination gourmet restaurant and disco tech and they kept saying this is our gourmet restaurant that you know like you couldn't make the decision they had to tell you this is our gourmet uh and it's a good combination you load up on that food and go out and blow lunch on the dance floor so um so I just I bombed miserably night after night it was dead silence I was supposed to do 40 minutes now I had 40 minutes of material if people would laugh at >> [laughter] >> If people wouldn't laugh at it, eight. I could do eight. I could do I [laughter] could do it just like a saliloquy. I could do a solid eight minutes. Um, so this one night, it's it's 4th of July, not just the 4th of July. It's the bicesentennial 4th of July. I'm out of material. I still got 35 minutes to go. So I go into my Hi, where you from? Hi, where you from? Hi, where you from? I come to this one guy. He's got a cowboy hat, cowboy shoes. He's drunk. And he says, I'm from Denver. And I said, oh, good. Nice to see. He says, "No, no, he's from Denver. She's from Denver. I'm from Denver. WE'RE ALL FROM DENVER. YOU'RE IN DENVER. [laughter]