Cribbins - Three Skits (16mm 1970)

nothing like a glass of champagne until this is a beautiful bed yes it is isn't it amazing to think that for 500 years my ancestors have on this very bed you ever seen inside this one always another bedroom that's nice oh yes it's another bedroom oh don't mind us just on the look round we've paid the off crowd i'm sorry there must be some mistake this is the private part of bambi hall i live here are you the duke are you as a matter of fact i am yes oh i do know oh i'm pleased about your questions my lordship my name is albert higgins my lord and my wife sonic and my lord but may i introduce my mother-in-law mrs bottomless would you all but i'm afraid that this is private oh but we haven't looked around no it may be but i don't know now please dear lord it says here a tour of banbury all children's six half a crown yes yes but not here i'll be with you no just uh please uh my eye thank you look it it doesn't say tour of part of bambi all says tour of bambree all this is his bamboo yes i see all right all right well would you just take a quick look around and then go right here hang on where's the guy what well he says he a guided tour where's the guide oh does it oh i see oh very well well um bed chandelier floor ceiling door window furniture thank you very much look at that here who the hell is that that is my wife as a matter of fact the duchess oh that's you [Laughter] i say and this young lady is here to index my stamp collection that's what i've only called some things in my time albert i mean in the old days the dukes used to just drive down from their castles and and do whatever they like the village virgins she is not uh what are you there oh look at that isn't that nice little steps away not lovely that's nice giving me that please this once belonged to mary antoinette oh yeah sticky fingers eh fell off for larry did it dude look at that little box that's nice isn't it enough it's got an inscription on oh look you can stick it together with condensed milk that's very good look at that oh you don't well you just have to wait that's all look look read that take your mind off it can't go five minutes without a cup of tea will you kindly leave and let me carry on i'll get on with it do not continue oh losing our regard with the velvet finger inside the steel gold is going to reveal itself don't you push me don't you will treat my mother-in-law are that's all the change i've got thank you very much terribly sorry about that darling it's one of those six months there yes the guide is supposed to keep people out of this part of the building unfortunately we've got a new fella on today and i'm afraid he doesn't quite know the routine however ah well now that you've locked the door yes oh my darling oh those liquid eyes full of promise alone at last not the end of the secret passage we have the present duke's bedroom we should now pass between the duke and his fancy [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] so me [Music] so ha ha [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] foreign [Music] uh [Applause] [Music] good morning hi good good morning honey hi goodness the heat up today hundred and what twenty is it yeah humidifier a little bit that's better my goodness okay excuse me is this your first sauna oh you are well um you're supposed to take your clothes off i'm not doing anything how dare yourself far too much of that permissiveness and people taking their clothes off all over the place far too much of it these days my goodness beginning to sweat now well that's the whole point you're supposed to sweat well i am sweating in decent privacy thank you inside my little wooly vest i i was ashamed of your body certainly not are you oh well not even that bit there we can leave it there i'd be ashamed of all that if i would you might have maybe i'd be ashamed of it i'm going to take a cold shower that's what the country needs more coal charge far too much of this nudity and permission isn't running about hm oh the hauntings have a shower myself oh yes much nicer that is yes much better oh my goodness gracious me yes once your clothes shrink what when it's all closed well they don't usually streak when i wear them in the bathroom you know but i i do find that the loofah tends to rub the pie on my velvet smoking jacket the wrong way you know yes yes well it wouldn't it yeah don't you ever take your clothes off well of course yes there are occasions when you simply must take off your clothes are they not no yes yes i mean like you know guildhall banquet or buckingham palace why are you acting up for that right i better turn it off yeah there we are oh nice invigorating mess up charlie charlie nothing's lagging off the door yes of course that's some of that new stuff good rub it in i've been in the top tell you that good fine i'll get the thumbs well in will you yeah bit of a knot up there you know oh that's it no no no stop that's me braces go around the bench you know that you're mad that's what you are they break your blood well all this business that the soul of the shower the massage with your clothes on why can't you be like everybody else said you're a party good morning [Music] [Music] [Applause]