Closed Mondays

Duration:

Year Published: 1974

Complete Record: The film opens with the words "Closed Mondays" in white on a black background filling the screen, then the camera pulls out to show that the words are part of a sign that reads: Aug 15–Oct 3 - One Woman Show - Celia Crazelsnuk Oct 3–March 19 - Usual Crap - Closed Mondays It is night. A small art gallery stands with its door slightly ajar and the lights on. A bulbous-nosed man with thinning grey hair, holding a brown bottle and apparently drunk, wanders in. As he shuffles through the gallery, a small abstract sculpture is transformed and imitates the man behind his back and returns to its original shape without his noticing. The drunk sees a picture of colorful musical notes that form a circle around a jagged shape resembling a red staircase in the middle of the picture. The picture moves to upbeat music for a moment and then returns to normal. Doubting his own eyes, the man looks again. The music begins to play, and a miniature man resembling the drunk skips down the stairs, stands on one of the circling musical notes, rides it for a while, then continues down the stairs to the bottom. The entire picture then becomes two abstract color/clay blobs that pulsate to the music. Suddenly the music stops and the drunk is back in the gallery, where he makes a critical comment ("What was that guy thinking of?!") and staggers away. The man sees a sculpture of a computerlike device with large lips and gauges for eyes. He laughs at the sculpture and flips a lever that starts it. The sculpture begins speaking rapidly and says it's a "replica of the model 505 type P electro brain," claims to be far superior to its creators, and carries out its "infinite mutation" program. The computer begins to stutter as it tries to say it has a short circuit and an error before changing into a talking globe, a talking apple, a colorful bust of Albert Einstein, a television, and finally a hand with smaller hands at the end of each of the fingers before entirely melting down into a shapeless mass of clay. The drunk walks away after making another comment ("Blabbermouth computer!") and is frightened by some jungle animals reaching through a glassless window pane that turns out to be a harmless painting. Feeling distressed, the drunk walks on, where he sees a painting of a medieval woman kneeling on a castle floor. She holds a brush in her hand and a bucket is beside her. The drunk asks her, "Hey… wassa matter?" She weeps and tells him, "Oh, if my master could have seen more of the beauty in life… Here I am on my knees, doomed to wear this sorrowful face, scrubbing this cold stone floor forever and forever and forever…" Then the painting returns to normal. The drunk sees the still-open door and runs to get out of the gallery, but is stopped just before he gets there. He is a piece of statuary, and returns to his inanimate state before reaching the door. The credits read: Voices by Todd Oleson & Molly Johnson Music by Bill Scream Created by Will Vinton & Bob Gardiner